The best MTB trails around Cerne Abbas

This was the part that I was longing for dry weather. The proper ridgeway from here on eastward is stunning but if less than knobby tyres you'll need to drop down.

Didn't really see any that jumped out at me to be honest, but these stocks are well cool!!!

4. It’s Actually Quite Tiny ​If you’re expecting a massive monolith like Stonehenge, prepare to be whelmed. It’s only about four feet tall. It’s the "fun-sized" version of an ancient mystery. It’s essentially the 12th-century version of a "No Entry" sign that everyone forgot to take down. ​5. The Real Mystery: The "Hands" ​Some archaeologists think it might actually be a boundary stone marking the limits of the lands owned by Milton Abbey. The "hand" might just be a very poorly carved symbol of authority, or a pointer saying, "The pub is that way."

​2. The "Hand of God" (Or Just a Very Suggestive Signpost) ​The most famous story—because history is better with a bit of drama—involves a local priest and a miracle. Legend says a priest from nearby Yetminster was carrying the "holy elements" to a dying man when he lost them. He found them later, guarded by a miracle: a hand appeared out of nowhere to point the way (or hold the elements, depending on who’s telling the story after three pints of cider). ​The stone was supposedly erected to say, "Hey, remember that time the floating hand happened? Good times." ​3. Thomas Hardy Made It "Goth" ​If you find the spot a bit creepy, you can thank local literary legend Thomas Hardy. He featured it in Tess of the d’Urbervilles. In the book, the "Cross-in-Hand" is described as a "thing of ill-omen" where a criminal supposedly had his hand cut off before being pinned to the stone. ​Hardy basically looked at a nice piece of local history and said, "How can I make this more depressing?"

If you’re wandering through the Dorset downs and stumble upon the Cross and Hand, don’t worry—you haven't accidentally walked onto the set of a low-budget folk horror movie. ​This little limestone pillar is essentially the world’s oldest, most confusing GPS. Here’s the lowdown on this weird piece of rock: ​1. It’s a Pillar with an Identity Crisis ​Sitting on the high ridge of Batcombe Hill, the Cross and Hand is a small stone pillar that looks like it’s been through a very long, very boring war. On one side, it features a carved hand, and on the top, there’s a cross. People have been arguing about what it is for centuries. Is it a boundary marker? A waypost? A very uncomfortable stool for a tired giant? Nobody knows for sure, but "Ancient Monument" sounds way more dignified.

Standing tall since the 1300s, St Mary’s is where you go to feel ancient and slightly judged by stone gargoyles. It boasts a stunning 15th-century tower and a posh stone screen that’s older than your family tree. Don't miss the medieval wall paintings—they’ve survived centuries of damp and hymns. It’s the perfect, holy spot to pray for forgiveness after giggling at the Giant’s nakedness just five minutes up the road. Amen to that!

Towering over the village is Britain’s most "well-endowed" landmark, a 180-foot chalk giant who clearly forgot his trousers—and his modesty. Carved into the hillside with a massive club and an even more massive... ego, he’s been blushing hikers for centuries. Legend says sleeping on his "manhood" boosts fertility, but most people just settle for a breathless selfie. He’s ancient, he’s shameless, and he’s definitely the only hillside that’s genuinely happy to see you.

The River Cerne is the ultimate chill companion, lazily winding its way through the valley. It’s less of a rushing torrent and more of a gentle, crystal-clear murmur that keeps the meadows lush. Perfect for a quick splash or just watching the water-crowfoot sway while you ignore your pedometer.